by Miho Kinnas
The original text from Ikuko Tanaka:
カシミールの空 田中郁子
着ているかどうかわからないので ずうっと身につけて いる山羊の毛の上着がある 自分の体が衣にぴったりし てくるのか 衣のほうが自分のほうに寄り添ってくるの か 心地よいのである ふと 山羊の匂いがしたり山羊 の目が 草原からこちらを見ている気配がするのだが さっと雲間に消えてしまう 幼い日 山羊を飼ったこと があるから解るのだが 何よりも自分を解放してくれる ひとときがあって それは人間の顔をはずして一匹の山 羊になれることである 時折 山羊の声を出して一つの 窓に映っているだけでいいのである 多忙な人にはわか らないだろうが 人込みの中に迷い込むことがあるが 轢き逃げされたことはない 最後に 糸になるだけであ り 糸になってもカシミールの空が一緒なのだ わたしは百枚の毛衣をまとっているように幸せだった しかし 次第に擦り切れていった やがて途方にくれる 日がきた とうとう両肘に穴があいた 破れ目である 毎日毎日両肘をついて遠いカシミールの空をみていたか らである わたしは体の破れ目をおおうすべを知らなか った 何日も何日も考えた 衣は衣だから体と一体とは いえ 自分の皮膚をもって継ぎ当てするわけにもいかな い また何日も何日も考えていると 窓いっぱいに草原 が広がり あの山羊が見えたが すぐ雲の中に消えてし まった それからのわたしは どこにいったのかわから ないのである たぶん 破れ目をおおうために 遠い国
で山羊の群れの一匹になってくらしているのだと思う 山羊の顔をして山羊の衣を着て 何事にもしばられず 永遠に安らかな平原で風にふかれているのであろう そ こに一度は 逢いにいってやらなければならないと思う
The following translation was published in my poetry collection, Move Over, Bird (2019.)
The Kashmir Sky
I cannot tell whether or not I have it on So I have been wearing the jacket made of goat wool all this time I cannot know whether or not my body fits the clothes or the clothes snuggle up to me Anyway it is comfortable I sometimes happen to smell a goat or feel the gaze of the goat looking this way from the field But that quickly disappears into the clouds I know those things as I kept a goat when I was little The moment of liberation is when I take the human mask off and become a goat All I need to do is, from time to time, to make a goat sound and appear in a window I do not know whether or not occupied people would understand it I sometimes get lost in the crowd but have never been the victim of a hit & run At the very last all that happens is to become a piece of thread Whether or not it is the end, the Kashmir sky is always with me even after becoming a thread I was happy as if wearing one hundred woolen jackets But it has been coming apart slowly and the day of no return has come The holes emerge at both elbows It is torn because I have been gazing at the Kashmiri sky cupping my cheeks day after day supported by my elbows I do not know how to mend the hole of my body I think and think for days The jacket is a jacket and even though the jacket and I are one I cannot patch it with my own skin I think for days and the field appears taking up the entire window and I see the goat but it quickly disappears into the clouds Since then I don’t know where I have gone Perhaps in order to mend the hole I am being one of the goats in a far away country With a goat face and goat clothes Completely free I am blown by the wind in the eternally peaceful field I think I should visit at least once, just to meet it
Every time I read my work, I always want to change something. I made small changes after I read it aloud the rhythm is better this way:
The Kashmir Sky
I cannot tell whether or not I have it on So I have been wearing the jacket made of goat wool all this time I cannot know whether or not my body fits the clothes or the clothes snuggle up to me Anyway it is comfortable I sometimes happen to smell a goat or feel the gaze of the goat looking this way from the field But that quickly disappears into the clouds I know those things as I kept a
goat when I was little The moment of liberation is when I take the human mask off and become a goat All I need to do is, from time to time, to make a goat sound and appear in a window I do not know whether or not occupied people would understand it I sometimes get lost in the crowd but have never been the victim of a hit & run At the very last all that happens is to become a piece of thread Whether or not it is the end, the Kashmir sky is always with me even after becoming a thread I was happy as if wearing one hundred woolen jackets But it has been coming apart slowly and the day of no return has arrived
comeThe holes emerge at both elbows It is torn because I have been gazing at the Kashmiri sky cupping my cheeks day after day onsupported bymy elbows I do not know how to mend the hole of my body I think and think for days The jacket is a jacket and even though the jacket and I are one I cannot patch my jacketitwith myownskin I think for days and the field appears taking up the entire window and I see athegoat but it quickly disappears into the clouds Since—thenI don’t know where I have gone Perhaps in order to mend the hole I am being one of the goats in a far away country With a goat face and goat clothes Completely free I am blown by the wind in the eternally peaceful field I think I should visit at least once, just to meet it
I could tinker on, but something else was bothering me and I think I knew what it was all along. The pronoun “I” appear as わたし(watashi)twice in the Japanese original, however there are
so many more in the translation. Yes, the Japanese is one of those languages which functions well without subjects. It may be perfectly justified as it is clarified the poem in the translation. However, simply translating the images is only half the job in the literary translation.
I wish I could explain the next version to Ikuko Tanaka. It is highly likely that the field is where Big sister Ikuko, I used to call her because she was the sister of a friend of mine, is being and watching goats.
The Kashmir Sky
All this time, unable to tell whether the jacket was on the body or not All this time unable to know whether the jacket of goat wool fits the body or the body snuggles up to it Anyway it is comfortable to smell a goat from time to time or feel the gaze of the goat looking this way from the filed no matter how quickly it disappears into the clouds A little girl who kept a goat knows those things The moment of liberation is when the human mask comes off and returning into a goat The occupied people may not understand but getting lost in the crowd doesn’t always end with a hit & run At the very last all that happens is to become a piece of thread Whether it is the real end or not the Kashmir sky stays right there above a mere piece of thread. Happiness is one hundred woolen jackets But it has been coming apart slowly and the day of no return has arrived The holes emerge at both elbows It is torn from gazing at the Kashmir sky cupping the cheeks day after day on the elbow How to mend the hole of the body? Thinking about it for days: the jacket is a jacket even though and the jacket and the body are one the jacket cannot be patched with the skin Thinking for more days and the field appears taking up the entire window and a goat appears and quickly disappears into the clouds Since then I have been missing Perhaps in
order to mend the hole becoming a goat in a far away country is necessary With a goat face and goat clothes Completely free blown by the wind in the eternally peaceful field where I should visit once.
©2023 Miho Kinnas
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Miho Kinnas is a poet, writer, and translator. Her poems and translations appeared in journals including Cha, Poetry Kanto and Star*line. Today, Fish Only (Math Paper Press, 2015) is her first book of poems. She holds an MFA in poetry from City University of Hong Kong. Wanting to cultivate her writing in Japanese, she decided to study at Interactive System of Inter-Scores Editing School where she met the Bibliobattle enthusiast, Akira Kisa. With Kisa's invitation, her debut Bibliobattle took place in February 2017. (She won!)
Miho co-translated a book of poems by Ikuko Tanaka with Shelly Bryant. Her poetry, translations, and book reviews were published in various journals, and The Belletrist Magazine nominated her poem "End" for The Pushcart prize in 2018. She has led poetry workshops based on haiku and renku at Pat Conroy Literary Festival, Harvard Art Museum, Shanghai Literary Festival, Life-Long Learning of Hilton Head, Bluffton Book Fair, USCB, Beaufort County Schools, and Montessori May River. Her creative works, as well as workshop material, often include her translations from various literature.
Her course, Fiction and Translation: a case study of Translations of Murakami, includes 4 videos, 3 ebooks, and 1-month access to A Polite Lie.